Rally up the teams, unite all women, pray fervently for one another!
Why is this not the approach we as women take when another woman is suffering from pregnancy loss and infertility? Why is it that everyone seems to take a step back, and forget when they suffered through grief?
When someone announces they have cancer everyone comes together in the community to support the family and the individual suffering and help them fight the battle any way they can (for which I am thankful), but what about the Mama crying on the bathroom floor that just flushed her baby down the toilet with all the blood and tissue from her miscarriage or the Mama that has once again been faced with the stark white pregnancy test while the teenager next door “accidentally” gets pregnant by her shady boyfriend? These are the real gruesome facts we face and the pain is unmistakably fierce! The heartache alone can easily take one down the darkest path that they never knew existed before.
What makes it worse, is that the ones closet to you always seem to be the ones who step away the farthest. “You can always try again,” “You are strong,” “You don’t NEED more kids,” “You are so young,” “I want YOU back,” are just a few of the words said by friends and family. Inside, you are screaming “If I lost this baby, I surely will lose again,” “I don’t want to have to be strong,” “You don’t understand me,” “ I never left, I just have a broken heart” “Love me for me!” This is a fight, a battle , a war we face and that may one day never end the way we once imagined.
Would you tell an amputee patient “ Well at least you still have your right arm!”? The answer to this is quite simple and seems almost “duh.” You would never allow this comment to seep out of your mouth if you truly knew or understood the pain. Not only are we suffering a loss but we are most likely dealing with an underlying medical issue that will need to be addressed.
Sleepy double rainbow baby
With that said, if the the baby announcements and birth stories on my photography page make your heart plummet in pain, it is okay to unfollow me @roseandbellephoto. I say this not to push you away but to tell you I understand you, I AM YOU! I know how dark and lonely it is, I know how jealousy rears its ugly head, I know how it seems baby bumps are popping up everywhere you seem to be. These feelings are all okay and normal.
Whether you long to be a mother, have lost, or deal with the battle of infertility, I hear your cries. I am your team, we can unite and I am already praying fervently for you. Please reach out and share your story, yours too is important and powerful and I know it will somehow provide hope for another woman in the fight.
-xoxo Danielle
The placenta, which sustains an infant’s life in the womb as the Lord has sustained my thankful heart even through the darkest days." “He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds.” Psalm 147:3 NIV
